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Barriers!

Written by IainM
Friendship born and friendship raised
I trusted you with my life
The secrets I told you
Youve guarded with yours

Yet this barrier has emerged
A void between ourselves
I dont know how it came about
Or what I can do to break it?

I want to talk but I keep saying no
Come to me she will I say
But she doesnt, it makes me wonder
Does she feel the same way?

This barrier needs breaking
It hurts more than Id care to admit
It consumes me, surrounds me
It has eaten me alive

This barrier needs breaking
Yet all I do is run and hide
Im a coward, a liar a no good cheat
Its no wonder she doesnt

Ive nothing left to offer her
Shes realised Im nothing
And soon all but one will follow suit
And back to square one again

I want to mend my bridges
But Im too afraid to make the first move
Im scared Ill screw it up further
So I just hide, and hide, and hide behind a happy fascade

They shouldnt have broken down
Why did I let them?
I should be talking but Im not
Why am I writing this?

Why cant I be a man for once? and do something without being a coward and backing out, things only get worse because of my lack of self-esteem and self confidence